End of an era. 

When I started this blog I didn’t know what it would come to be. I started it as a young 16 year old struggling with a mental illness trying to come to terms with it and recovering from it with exercise and therapy documenting my triumphs and trying times.My goal from the beginning has always been to be honest, no matter what I was going through. I just wanted to have somewhere where I could be as authentic as possible and have a platform to express my real self on. And I’m so grateful to have had that and grow with that. 

I never imagined inspiring people, making great friends on here and finding myself as a person through blogging. I was simply someone who wanted to have my space on the Internet to share my thoughts and my heart with the world. Now three and a half years later, I’m almost 20 years of age, fully recovered, studying journalism of all things at college/university (a decision inspired by this blog) and I now am confident enough to sit in front of a camera and make YouTube videos. 

I’ve come to realise that I was never supposed to write the story forever. 
The word ‘run’ indicates movement; I was never supposed to define myself through running but I was supposed to run to where I needed to be, to become who I was meant to be. And the word ‘therapy’ derives from the Greek word for ‘healing’ and ‘minister to’ which is what this blog gave me in the sense of aid the healing of my heart, to be able to inspire you and ultimately shape me into who I am today. 

Through narrating my whole journey of recovery and gaining strength from therapy and fitness on here I’ve achieved more than I ever imagined. Over the years I’ve been working hard towards being the person I wished to be, someone I envisioned who was strong and powerful, someone who would be able to stand up against my demons back then and recently I realised that I’m no longer running towards something anymore and this is because I’ve already become her. 

The road never ends, it only becomes brighter. To anyone still in the midst of their own battle, take it as the chance to become your own hero. In life we will always have our triumphs and our downfalls, but we will always continue to go forward. 

I’ve completed the story and finished the narrative. I think the biggest thing I’ve learnt over the three and a half years is to never be ashamed of being yourself. No matter what ugliness you may experience or shame you feel towards yourself; nothing is more true and beautiful that authentically and unapologetically yourself. Your soul is a compilation of fragments of your experiences, emotions and surroundings that you resonate with which create something beautiful in your entity and that is something to embrace and never feel shame to present to the world. 

I thank all readers/followers/supporters who have resonated, been inspired and been supportive over the years from the bottom of my heart, thank you for making the most formative years of my life amazing. My aim in every post I’ve ever written was for you to be able to take something positive and apply it to your own lives and I’ve hoped to have done that and with that I wish you all nothing but the very best. 

It’s been a good ride,
Best,
Tasha 

(You can still keep up with me on my YouTube channel: LivingAsTasha and my site http://www.herindependenceofspirit.com)

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Meet me at the bar….😏😜

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I will probably never have abs, I will probably never be super skinny but I sure as hell will be happier and more confident with what I see in the mirror!

I had a body blip day a few days ago where I just did not feel happy with what I saw in the mirror when I tried on my bikini and felt bad I hadn’t been able to go to the gym as much for the past few weeks because of exams.

Yes, even after two years of therapy, dropping a dress size and adding some muscle tone I still struggle with my self confidence but I’m learning how to accept my body more. My thighs will always be thick because that’s the way God made them not because I ate two servings of carbs instead of one.

My neighbour also told me that she noticed I lost some weight and my skin looked a lot better and brighter and that’s all due to the lifestyle I maintain.

I’m learning that It’s very difficult to not compare and pick your body apart of its imperfections but everything that makes you different makes you human. And that’s okay. I’m only now learning that MY CURVES ARE OKAY. My body is not meant to be supermodel lean, that isn’t the way I was designed. Simple as. It’s not because I don’t do enough cardio or I eat too much.

I look in the mirror and I see and strength and as long as that’s what I feel every time I look in the mirror then I’m going to be okay.

Update!

Hey guys! Sorry I haven’t posted for a while, I’ve been busy with exams and now I’m finally free for the summer (woo!) 

I’ve also started up my own YouTube channel – not a lot of people know about me that I’ve always loved videography but always been too scared to upload stuff until now!
You can check out my new video here https://youtu.be/_gEL6i4tFqU

I will be making health and fitness videos very soon but now I’m dabbling into other interests as I’ve literally only posted about health and fitness for the last three years lol! Hope you guys like it and feel free to subscribe! 😊

Rehabilitate. 

 

 Yesterday, I went to the physio because I hadn’t been in a over a year and thought I’d get a sports massage to relieve my right calves. 

Turns out during my assessment that the underlying reason to why my calves always get really tight isn’t because they’re weak, but they’re overcompensating due to a misalignment of my right hip which means that my hip abductors and flutes aren’t working like they should be. 

I’m glad I went since I learnt I was at risk of a stress fracture in my left leg and that some of the nerves in my legs are irritated. 

It’s kinda crazy because I just assumed that my calves just weren’t strong enough or weren’t stretching properly, little did I know that they were trying to keep me going by overloading. So now I’m written off running until I rehabilitate and strengthen my glutes and hip abductors. 

I realised strength is shown in how hard you work to keep it together and keep going but sometimes you need to slow down and pay attention to what is causing the pain and really focus on recovering those weaknesses. 

I’m not one who likes to slow down and sort things out, I like to just keep going in effort to not let things get in the way but I guess I’ve learnt from my journey of recovery sometimes you really need to – if you keep going you’re going to crash yourself out. But, that’s okay because you always come back stronger.